When Fighting Problems Became Accepting Them
Rea,
Ever notice how homework, tests, and friend troubles can pile up until your brain feels like a too-full backpack? There’s a story from long ago that might help when life gets overwhelming.
About 2,500 years ago in northern India, a farmer hiked for days to find the Buddha. This farmer was having the worst year ever. His crops were dying in a drought, his children were sick, his wife was miserable, and he owed money to everyone in the village. He had exactly 83 problems, all written down on a long scroll.
When he finally found the Buddha sitting peacefully under a tree, the farmer waved his problem list. “Great teacher! I have 83 problems making my life impossible. Please help me solve them!”
The Buddha looked at him calmly and said something totally unexpected: “I cannot help you with those 83 problems.”
The farmer’s jaw dropped. “What? I walked for days to see you! What do you mean you can’t help?”
“Those 83 problems are just part of being alive,” the Buddha explained. “Everyone has them. Solve these, and new ones will take their place.”
The farmer crossed his arms. “Then what good are you as a teacher?”
The Buddha smiled. “I can help you with your 84th problem.”
“What 84th problem?” the farmer asked, scratching his head. “I only counted 83.”
“Your 84th problem is that you want to not have any problems.”
The farmer’s eyes widened as it clicked. Fighting against having problems was actually problem #84 – and it was making all the others feel heavier!
Have you ever worried about a test for days, then after finishing it thought, “Why was I so worked up about this?” That’s the 84th problem in action! The worry often feels worse than the actual challenge.
It’s like your brain is that one friend who thinks the best way to prepare you for rain is by following you around all day saying, “Don’t forget, it might rain! Are you thinking about the rain? What about now? STILL thinking about rain?” Your friend believes they’re being super helpful, but they’re actually making you more stressed than getting a little wet ever would!
The farmer headed home with his 83 problems still there, but his approach completely changed. Instead of wasting energy wishing he had no problems, he focused on what he could actually fix. The problems didn’t magically vanish, but suddenly they felt much lighter to carry.
Love, Abba
P.S. Next time you’re nervous about something big, try saying “It’s okay to feel nervous about this” instead of “I shouldn’t be nervous.” See if that small switch makes the challenge a little easier to handle!
